With the Noble Hadith
Treat Women Well
We greet you all, dear listeners everywhere, in a new episode of your program "With the Noble Hadith" and we begin with the best greeting, so peace, mercy, and blessings of God be upon you.
It is mentioned in Sunan Ibn Majah - Book of Marriage - Abu Bakr bin Abi Shaybah narrated to us, Al-Hussein bin Ali narrated to us from Zaidah from Shabib bin Gharqadah Al-Bariqi from Suleiman bin Amr bin Al-Ahwas, my father told me that he witnessed the Farewell Pilgrimage with the Messenger of God, may God bless him and grant him peace, so he praised God and praised Him, and mentioned and preached, then said: "Treat women well, for they are like captives in your hands. You do not possess anything else from them other than that, unless they commit a clear immorality. If they do, then abandon them in their beds and beat them lightly. If they obey you, then do not seek a way against them. You have rights over your women, and your women have rights over you. As for your right over your women, they should not allow anyone you dislike to tread on your beds, nor allow anyone you dislike to enter your houses. And their right over you is that you treat them well in their clothing and food."
It is mentioned in the explanation of the hadith in the book Sunan Ibn Majah with the explanation of Al-Sindi - Book of Marriage - Treat women well
His saying: (Treat women well) It was said that istiysa' (treating well) is accepting the recommendation, meaning I recommend them to you with goodness, so accept my recommendation regarding them. Al-Taybi said: For the request, meaning ask for the recommendation from yourselves for themselves with goodness, or some of you ask others to be kind to them and to be patient with the crookedness of their morals without reason, and it was said that istiysa' means: al-iysa'.
His saying: (awan) plural of aniyah, meaning: captive
His saying: (other than that) that is, other than the usual matter for which their marriage was legislated
His saying: (unless they commit etc.) meaning, you do not possess other than that at a time except when they commit a clear immorality: meaning, apparent in obscenity and ugliness, and what is meant is rebelliousness, bad character, and harming the husband and his family with the tongue and hand, not adultery, as it is not appropriate.
His saying: (a non-severe beating) and this is what is appropriate for the saying of God Almighty: "And those from whom you fear نشوزهن (rebellion)", the verse, so the hadith on this is like an interpretation of the verse, for what is meant by beating in it is the moderate beating, not the severe one.
His saying: (and the beds) the sleeping places, meaning do not put them under the blankets and do not touch them, so it is a metaphor for intercourse.
His saying: (not severe) with a dammah, then a fatha, and a shaddah on the raa' and a silent haa', it is the severe and difficult one "if they obey you" in abandoning rebelliousness "then do not seek" etc. with rebuke and harm, meaning remove from them the exposure and make what was from them as if it had never been, for the one who repents from sin is like the one who has no sin.
His saying: (do not allow to tread) the adjective of the plural of women from al-ita', Ibn Jarir said in his interpretation in its meaning: that they do not allow anyone other than you to control themselves, and it was rejected because there is then no meaning to stipulating hatred because adultery is forbidden in all ways, I said: It is possible to answer that the hatred in their intercourse usually includes everyone except the husband, and therefore Ibn Jarir said: anyone other than you, so there is no problem, and Al-Khattabi said its meaning: that they do not allow any of the men to enter and talk to them, and the conversation from men to women was one of the customs of the Arabs, they did not see that as a defect and did not consider it suspicious, so when the verse of the hijab was revealed and women became confined, he forbade talking to them and sitting with them.
His saying: (whom you dislike) that is, you dislike his entry, whether you dislike him in himself or not, it was said: The chosen one is to prevent them from allowing anyone to enter and sit in the houses, whether he is a mahram or a woman, except with his consent, and God knows best.
Dear listeners:
God has made married life a life of companionship and association in which one accompanies the other completely in all respects, a companionship in which one is reassured to the other, as God has made this marriage a place of reassurance, and God Almighty has recommended good companionship between spouses.
And husbands must treat their wives well, for God has made the leadership of the house to the husband over the wife, so He made him in charge of her. God Almighty said: "Men are in charge of women"
And the meaning of the husband's authority over the woman, and his leadership of the house, is not that he is the one in control, the ruler of it so that no order is rejected for him, but rather the meaning of the husband's leadership of the house is to take care of its affairs and manage it, and not authority or rule in it, because they are companions and not an emir and a subordinate, or a ruler and ruled, but they are companions who have made the leadership of one of them in terms of managing their house, and taking care of the affairs of this house. And the Messenger of God e was like that in his house, a companion to his wives, and not an emir dominating them, despite being the head of state, and despite being a prophet. Muslim narrated in his Sahih: that Abu Bakr asked permission to enter upon the Prophet, and entered after he was granted permission, then Omar asked permission and entered after being granted permission, and found the Prophet sitting and his wives around him, silent, so Omar said: I will say something to make the Prophet e laugh, then he said: O Messenger of God, if you saw the daughter of Kharija asking me for maintenance, I would have gone to her and punched her neck, so the Messenger of God e laughed and said: «They are around me asking me for maintenance». From this, it becomes clear that the meaning of the man's authority over the woman is that the matter is his, but the matter is companionship, not the matter of domination and control, so she reviews him and discusses him.
May God bless our master Muhammad and his family and companions and grant them peace
Dear listeners, until we meet you with another prophetic hadith, we leave you in God's care, and peace, mercy, and blessings of God be upon you.
